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Feb

2

Another schoolbus tragedy at another unmanned railway crossing

February 2, 2009 posted by indiatime | 1 Comment

This is probably the nth time for this to have happened in this country. Yet another schoolbus colliding with a train. Yet another unmanned railway crossing. Little children ready to go to school, now lying in pools of blood. Several dead and others maimed for life. India’s latest schoolbus tragedy happened this morning, on the Ferozeopur-Ludhiana railway track near Talwandi in Punjab. Six students of the DAV Public School in Talwandi, are said to have died.

Only a year ago, the same area in Punjab had reported 17 deaths (including 8 students and 2 teachers) in another unmanned crossing accident near Moga. A few months ago, the Railways Divisional Manager for the Punjab region had bragged about a new interlocking level crossing system that was supposed to prevent such tragedies from happening.

The Firozepur district, the area od this morning’s tragedy is home to 550 unmanned railway crossings. This is just one district in one state in India. India’s huge railway system is said to have several thousand unmanned railway crossings (~ 26,000). Those are 26,000 tragedies waiting to happen. With school buses packed with little children going across those 26,000 unmanned crossings in India, it must be pure luck that only so many die from such accidents.

Here’s a clip of one such railway crossing where oil-carrying trucks, two-wheelers, four-wheelers, camels, pedestrians and buses all seem to be competing to cross the unmanned railway crossing. The other side of this adventurous and comic crazines is the tragedy that took the lives of six kids who dod not make it to their classes this morning.

Dec

27

Greetings from Karachi

December 27, 2008 posted by indiatime | 3 Comments

Indian politicians seem to be losing the war of words with their Pakistani counterparts. Pakistani media, however, seem to be struggling with words. Here is a Pakistani TV reporter reporting on his fellow citizens’ holiday travels.

Thanks Naren, for sharing this gem with our readers.

Sep

5

Air India serving snakes on board?

September 5, 2008 posted by indiatime | 13 Comments

For passengers traveling on the Air India passenger jet from Kashmir to New Delhi the day before, the journey came close to becoming a harrowing experience from hell, when the plane crew discovered that one of the co-passengers was a poisonous cobra. No, it wasn’t some human fellow passenger tuning into a cobra (as frequently seen on India’s TV soaps). It was a real cobra, an authentic snake, a no-nonsense reptile from the animal kingdom.

Air India tried to take the bite off the news, contending that the snake was not a cobra, but just another snake. The airline confessed that a snake was indeed found on the plane, but maintained that it was found not in-flight, but found coiled up under the seat when the plane was parked at the New Delhi airport for maintenance after it had landed (meaning the snake was most probably on the flight and not detected until later).

Efforts to corner the snake proved futile, however. The cabin crew and maintenance workers removed fuselage panels, fumigated the plane and short of inviting expert snake charmers to charm it out of the plane, they did everything they could.

Strangely, Air India denied reports that the plane’s next flight from Delhi to Mumbai was delayed. In the same breath that the spokesperson denied the delay reports, he also confessed that Air India had no idea where the snake was.

snakes on a plane So, the next time you take up your seat inside an Air India flight, look under your seat first. Then look under the seat in front, which would be the space that will host your feet for the length of the journey. If you do see anything that resembles a snake, do not waste your precious time on the flight attendant call button. Do not waste your time calling 911 or 100 or whatever the code where you come from is. Shout as hard as you can. Wave, jump, put out a shrill cry for help with your best horrror-film face on.

Speaking of horror films, years ago, David Dalessandro, a University of Pittsburgh administrator, wrote a story about snakes on a plane, after he read about reports on snakes inside world war II cargo planes in southeast Asia. That story turned into a B-movie a few years ago,. Now that India has its own authentic snake story, there is a good chance to see a flick that will soon delight us with cobras on an Indian airliner, a few romantic songs woven in the Bollywood beat, one of Bollywood’s Khans as a pilot, one of our sexy item heroines undulating her way through the isle serving spicy breasts and thighs to passengers who have already turned to chicken hearing about a snake on their plane.

May

9

Real gems from Indiaâ€™s parliament - 2

May 9, 2007 posted by indiatime | Leave a Comment

While I am on the subject of the parliament, here is yet another series of gems from the actual question-answer sessions of the Indian parliament. I had posted the first of these a few days ago.

Today we’ll be looking at 3 questions on tilting of India’s archeological monuments.

1. The first is from December 04, asked by Gurudas Kamat, to the Minister of information and broadcasting and culture (Jaipal Reddy):

Will the Minister of CULTURE be pleased to state:-

(a) whether the historical monument-Qutab Minar is tilting at fast rate

(b) if so, the reasons therefore

The minister’s answer:

(a) No, Sir. The close examination of the monument shows no such signs of tilting the monument

(b) Question Does not arise.

2. The second is from April 05, asked by Salarapatty Kuppusamy Kharventhan, to the same minister (Jaipal Reddy):

Will the Minister of CULTURE be pleased to state:-

(a) whether the Government is aware that some of the minarets and towers in the country are reported to be tilting

The minister’s answer:

(a) Yes, Sir. Archaeological Survey of India is aware of the tilting of minarets of Taj Mahal and Qutab Minar, Delhi.

3. The third is from December 05, asked by Raman Senthil, to the same minister (Jaipal Reddy):

Will the Minister of CULTURE be pleased to state:-

(a) whether the minarets of Taj Mahal are tilting

The minister’s answer:

(a) From the triangulation, traverse and leveling data, Survey of India has concluded that the dome and four minarets of Taj Mahal remained quite stable in plan as well as in elevation from 1940 to 1994

If your head is tilting and spinning already, here is a remedy - my favorite tilting head superstar singing his heart out right inside Kutub Minar itself. Enjoy!

May

3

Classically speaking…

May 3, 2007 posted by indiatime | Leave a Comment

A Cricket in the Court of Akbar

Fascinating Tabla-Congo duet

Apr

29

India doesn’t need no prozac! We’ve got Bollywood!

April 29, 2007 posted by indiatime | 2 Comments

While on the subject of Bollywood, I think it is important to see why the world outside cannot relate to Bollywood with real seriousness. If only they saw what we see. They probably don’t know that we don’t take Bollywood plots that seriously either. For us, it’s the ultimate anti-stress pill, the best serotonin-uptake inhibitor. Yeah, we don’t need no prozacs! We have Bollywood! So on this last Sunday of the month, here are 3 shots of the laughter medicine:-

The first one is from Chiranjivi film. See how this Indian hero manages to skid under the truck while riding a horse!

Bad guys shooting at the Indian hero? No problems. See how the bullet manages to actually ricochet off the hero’s manly chest and shoot the shooter himself.

And see how the yogic powers of the Indian hero can push an entire train

Apr

28

India’s answer to Chinese competition: horse tranquilisers!

April 28, 2007 posted by indiatime | Leave a Comment

India may have become the largest manufacturer, supplier, distributor, and exporter of the date rape drug which is finding its way to the neighboring asian countries and beyond. Also troubling the authorities is the fact that 15,000 kilograms of the schedule H Indian drug are missing, or unaccounted for.

Out of the 3 major commonly known date rape drugs (gamma hydroxybutyric acid, flunitrazepam, and Ketamine), the concern is about Ketamine (aka cat valium, horse tranquiliser, super acid, purple, etc.), because the package can be disguised as coconut powder, or wheat flour.

The recent arrest of 251 youngsters in Pune (supposed to be Oxford of the East) was a frightful reminder that the date rape drugs are finding their ways to India’s major and smaller cities. But the place where the largest amounts of the date rape drugs get exported, is China.Yes, China - our major competitor for superpowerdom.

So, who know :-), India may finally have found an answer to curb China’s rising competition in manufacturing, and other industrial areas. Give China’s youth huge supplies of horse tranquilisers, let them have fun, and while they are at it, enjoy the fruits of the economic boom.

For those, who still don’t get why horse tranquilsers would be such a deal, here is a youtube video showing a poor guy on horse tranquilisers:

Feb

25

Nominations for funniest foreign film category

February 25, 2007 posted by indiatime | 1 Comment

If only Oscars had a funny films category! India would probably not only win all the nominations, India will RULE that category! Here are my nominations for the funniest foreign film. For an out-of-this world experience, you can try playing multiple movies at once.

Feb

22

Only in India

February 22, 2007 posted by indiatime | 1 Comment

If you haven’t watched it yet, you don’t want to miss this very very funny clip ‘Welcome to India’ (based on ‘welcome to atlanta by Ludacris) by - yes, Ludakrishna!